Feb 27

Olympic Alternatives XII

You thought I was not serious?

I’m dead serious.  The only way to effect change is through sacrifice (changing your habits) and protest (telling people what you think, publicly).

Plenty of other stuff out on the Hypnotoad.  Just look-

The Hypnotoad.

"Television is a vast wasteland"
hypnotoad

Afternoon Update.

Early Evening Update.

Early Primetime Update.

Late Primetime Update.

Late Night Update.

Why are you Update.

Here’s a list of things (not comprehensive) I think more worthy of your eyeballs.

Instead of Men’s Curling (Bronze) Sweden v. Switzerland on USA

9:00 Oxygen America’s Next Top Model 9:00
10:00 TBS Corrina, Corrina 12:30
10:30 TCM The Manchurian Candidate 12:30
10:30 ABC Family My Girl 1:00
11:00 Lifetime Footloose 1:00
11:00 SciFi Supergator 1:00
11:00 VH-1 Celebrity Rehab w/ Dr. Drew 1:00
12:00 A&E Shanghai Noon 2:30
12:00 AMC The War Wagon 2:30
12:00 Bravo Kell on Earth 2:00
12:00 ESPN Michigan @ Ohio State 2:00
12:00 FX Wild Hogs 2:00
12:00 MTV Turn The Beat Around 2:00
12:00 TNT Mission: Impossible III 2:30
12:00 CBS College Basketball 2:00
12:30 TBS The Cookout 2:30
12:30 TCM From Here to Eternity 2:30

Sigh.  Only 12 Hours of America’s Next Top Model.

Shanghai Noon has Jackie Chan who is always fun.  The War Wagon is a John Wayne Shoot ‘Em Up.  Turn The Beat Around is so new (2010) it doesn’t even have a wiki page yet.

Mission III?  I think I’ve told you how I feel about Tom Cruise.

Queen Latifa, homophobia, TCM once again comes through with the class of this time period.

If you got up early enough, catch the Candidate– “Raymond Shaw is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life.”  I think actually this is one of Angela Landsbury’s best roles and it also has Frank Sinatra.  Oddly enough injuries suffered during production kept him from taking the lead in Dirty Harry.  In any event even if you didn’t watch it read the plot summary and decide for yourself- Paranoid?  Or not paranoid enough?

Eternity inspired a generation or two to try making love on a beach which I have and found incredibly uncomfortable and awkward, even more so than normal.  While almost all the characters are detestable, why Frank used his Mafia connections to get the role of Maggio, the gay guy who gets beaten to death by Captain McHale, is a puzzle.

That is of course unless the horse is the famous head in a bed.

I’m kind of pissed that CBS didn’t post the teams.  It offends my obsession.

Instead of Speed Skating Pursuit, Snowboarding, and Cross Country on NBC

1:00 Spike Road House 2 3:00
1:00 ABC Family My Girl 2 3:00
1:00 History WW II in HD 11:00
1:00 Lifetime Gracie 3:00
1:00 SciFi War Wolves 3:00
1:00 TLC What Not to Wear 3:00
1:00 Toon Billy & Mandy’s Big Boogey Adventure 3:00
1:00 Discovery Extreme Loggers 7:00
2:00 ESPN Texas @ Texas A&M 4:00
2:00 CBS North Carolina @ Wake Forest 4:00
2:00 Bravo Millionaire Matchmaker 4:00
2:00 FX Human Target 8:00
2:30 A&E Eraser 5:00
2:30 AMC Silverado 5:30
2:30 TCM Elmer Gantry 5:00
2:30 TBS I Think I Love My Wife 4:30
2:30 TNT Independence Day 5:30
3:00 ABC Family Nancy Drew 5:00
3:00 Lifetime Uptown Girls 5:00
3:00 Toon Ben 10: Alien Force 6:00
3:00 Comedy Dumb & Dumberer 5:00
3:00 SciFi Vipers 5:00
3:00 Spike Road House 5:30
3:00 Food Chopped 4:00
3:00 USA Law & Order 12:00
4:00 Bravo Real Housewives 6:00
4:00 CBS Kansas at Oklahoma State 6:00
4:00 ESPN Wendy’s Champions Skins Game (Champion’s Tour) 6:00
4:00 Food Dinner Impossible 5:00
4:00 Disney Wizards of Waverly Place 8:00
5:00 A&E The Green Mile 8:00
5:00 ABC Family Legally Blonde 7:00
5:00 Food Iron Chef America 7:00
5:00 Lifetime The Positively True Adventures of the Alleged Texas Cheerleader-Murdering Mom 7:00
5:00 SciFi Black Swarm 7:00
5:00 TCM The Nun’s Story 8:00
5:00 VH-1 Celebrity Fit Club Boot Camp 7:00
5:00 Comedy Napolean Dynamite 7:00
5:00 Nick Spongebob Squarepants 7:00
5:00 E! Keeping Up With the Kardashians 7:30
5:30 TNT The Replacements 8:00
5:30 AMC Dante’s Peak 8:00
5:30 Spike First Blood 7:30

Some people think because they’re stronger, or meaner, that they can push you around. I’ve seen a lot of that. But it’s only true if you let it be. The world is what you make of it.

Let me tell you about your friend Paden. A long time ago, me, Paden, Tyree, and a couple of other fellas did a lot of riding together. On business, and business was pretty good. We moved around a lot, the way you have to in that line of work. Somewhere along the way, we picked up this dog. One of us took to feeding it, so it followed us everywhere. Well, one day we’re leaving this little Missouri town, in kind of a hurry with a bunch of the locals hot on our tail. Somehow this dog got tied up with Tyree’s horse. Tyree went flyin’.

Well, Tyree was pretty mad when he got up, and, being Tyree, he shot the dog. Didn’t kill him, though. The next thing you know, Paden’s down off his horse, and he’s holdin’ this dog, sayin’ we should go on without him. I thought he was kidding, except he wasn’t. Tyree was ready to plug ’em both – all this with the posse ridin’ down on us.

I thought we were pals after all that riding we did together. All of a sudden he’s worried about some mutt. Well, we did like he asked. We left him, and he went to jail for a dog. You want to hear the funny part? Paden didn’t even like that damn dog.

It evened out in the end. They locked me up; the dog sprung me.

If you have any sense at all you’ll be watching Silverado, a truly great movie.

It’s kind of odd that Spike is running Road Host back to front. 2 is the one without Swayze.  Mile is another Tom Hanks movie that’s not Forrest Gump though we’ve seen it recently.

I’ve always wondered why every alien computer is susceptable to hacking by a Mac Book, except those running any variant of Windows (which would be about 95% of them).

History has 10 full hours of High Definition carnage too painful to look at.  You’ve been warned.  Only 9 hours of Law & Order, but they had to make room for the Curling.

If you think this section is long, check out tomorrow’s coverage of the 2 x 3 Hour Figure Skating Exhibition Repeat (Yes Repeat because they’re showing it twice tonight) from 6 am to noon.  I’ll be putting up a special edition of Alternatives at 6 to cover this time period.

Instead of Men’s Curling (Gold) Canada v. Norway on CNBC

6:00 Bravo House 2:00
6:00 ESPN Mississippi State @ South Carolina 8:00
6:00 Food Iron Chef America 7:00
6:00 Nick Spongebob Squarepants 7:00
6:00 Toon Johnny Test 7:00
6:00 TV Land Andy Griffith 10:00
6:00 VH-1 Celebrity Fit Club Boot Camp 7:00
7:00 Comedy Office Space 9:00
7:00 ABC Family My Fake Fiance 9:00
7:00 Lifetime Sorority Wars 9:00
7:00 Nick iCarly 8:30
7:00 SciFi Yeti 9:00
7:00 Discovery Raging Planet 3:00
7:00 VH-1 Saturday Night Fever 9:30
7:00 Travel Man v. Food 11:00
7:30 Spike Rambo: First Blood Part 2 9:30

Gotta love the pants.

ABC Family is going with a fake boyfriends theme tonight.  8 Hours of House.  8 Hours of Raging Planet.

No good movies you aren’t already watching except for maybe Office Space which has the virtue of being by Mike Judge of Bevis and Butthead and King of the Hill fame.

Instead of Alpine Skiing, 4 Man Bobsled, Men’s Parallel Snowboarding, and Figure Skating Exhibition on NBC

8:00 ABC Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix 11:00
8:00 A&E Gone in 60 Seconds 10:30
8:00 AMC Forrest Gump (x 2) 2:00
8:00 E! Evan Almighty 10:00
8:00 TMC Tom Jones 10:00
8:00 TNT The Longest Yard 10:30
8:00 Toon Teen Titans 8:00
8:00 Food Iron Chef America 4:00
8:30 Toon Batman: The Brave and the Bold 9:00
9:00 ESPN Villanova at Syracuse 11:00
9:00 Comedy Hot Rod 11:00
9:00 ABC Family The Wedding Date 11:00
9:00 Lifetime Sydney White (x 2) 1:00
9:00 Oxygen The Perfect Man (x 2) 1:00
9:00 SciFi Beauty and the Beasts: A Dark Tale 11:00
9:30 Spike 1000 Ways to Die 4:00
9:30 Disney Phineas and Ferb 10:30
9:30 VH-1 Celebrity Rehab w/ Dr. Drew 11:30

So now we know it’s sorority night on Lifetime.  Also that that they’re dueling Oxygen with back to back repeats.  Replace Sydney with ‘Snow’ and you’l have a pretty good idea of the plot.  Oxygen’s entry is a Hillary Duff vehicle, but it does include ‘Mr. Big’ for his fans.

Again Adam Sandler.  Gumped again.  Steve Carell is no Jim Carry.  

Gone is the millenial remake of the 1974 original which is great if you’re a Nicholas Cage fan I suppose.

Hot Rod is a Will Ferrell project and if he’d been onscreen I’m sure it would have made more money.

I’ve not much to say about Harry except I’m wild about him.  This episode was my first experience with IMAX 3D and it’s gut wrenching and frankly ruins the cinematography of the last 20 minutes in that Dr. Tongue’s House of Stewardesses way.  I guess the other thing I have to say is that the reason I don’t much cover the over the air broadcast networks is that they don’t often show anything I want to watch.

Batman B&B is a repeat of Friday’s Justice Society episode.

Allez Cuisine!  8 Hours (count ’em) 8 Hours of Iron Chef America.

‘Nova at the Dome!  Spent a lot of time in Syracuse Lifeguarding.  Go Orange!

Instead of Men’s Hockey (Bronze) Slovakia v. Finland on MSNBC

10:00 MTV Land of the Dead (x 2) 2:00
10:00 TCM Titanic 1:30
10:00 Toon King of the Hill 11:00
10:00 TV Land Roseanne 3:00
10:30 TNT Independence Day 1:30
11:00 ABC Family When Harry Met Sally 1:00
11:00 FX The Fast and the Furious 1:00
11:00 SciFi Beyond Sherwood Forest 1:00
11:00 Toon Stroker and Hoop 11:30
11:30 Toon Boondocks 12:00

Land of the Dead is a genuine George Romero entry.  Titanic the James Cameron cash cow.

Land is actually worth a look, at least at the wiki entry.

Another Tom Hanks film that’s not Gump.  Beyond Sherwood Forest is a Peter DeLuise film.  Not only the son of Dom, he also directed Stargate SG-1.

You’ll thank me for these listings when Hockey runs out and all you have is repeats of the Figure Skating Exhibition for the next 12 hours.

Well, from now until the Men’s Hockey Final tomorrow at noon you have nothing but repeats.

NBC Primetime coverage including the Figure Skating Exhibition (ugh) on NBC from 1 until 3:30.

Curling Gold on MSNBC from 3 to 6.

Tomorrow on MSNBC from 6 am until noon you have back to back repeats of the Figure Skating Exhibition.

I’m going to cover your choices tonight from midnight until 6 am in this essay, then I’ll put an essay covering from 6 am until noon on future publish.

At noon I’ll publish an essay covering the final events- Men’s Cross Country (50k) and the Gold Medal Hockey game as well as the Closing Ceremony, Recap, and repeat of the Closing Ceremony going to 3 am Monday.

After that you’re on your own.

TheMomCat will be handling Afternoon Edition tomorrow and Monday.  Tuesday or Wednesday I’ll have my own meta recap on February Sports blogging at DocuDharma.

11:30 NBC Saturday Night Live 1:00
12:00 A&E Gone in 60 Seconds 2:30
12:00 History WW II in HD 3:00
12:00 Travel Man v. Food 3:00
12:00 USA Burn Notice 1:00
12:00 Toon Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood 12:30
12:30 Toon Bleach 2:30
1:00 Lifetime Project Runway 2:00
1:00 Oxygen The First Wives Club 3:00
1:00 SciFi Beauty and the Beasts: A Dark Tale 3:00
1:30 TCM Gold Diggers of 1935 3:30
1:30 TNT Mission: Impossible III 4:00
1:30 TBS The Wood 3:30
2:00 AMC Silverado 5:00
2:00 MTV Scream 3 4:30
2:30 Toon FLCL 3:00

Despite the critics I liked First Wives.  Gold Diggers is one of those Busby Berkeley things that he’s so famous for.  Tom Cruise is still a waste of time and Silverado is not.

FLCL is just plain wierd.

Instead of the repeat of Men’s Curling (Gold) Canada v. Norway on MSNBC

3:00 SciFi Merlin and the War of the Dragons 5:00
3:00 Toon Cowboy BeBop 3:30
3:00 VH-1 Celebrity Fit Club Boot Camp 4:00
3:00 Disney Halloweentown 2: Kalabar’s Revenge 4:30
3:30 TBS Corrina, Corrina 6:00
3:30 TCM Stage Door 5:00
3:30 Toon Ghost in the Shell 4:00
4:00 TNT Law & Order 1:00
4:00 TV Land Three’s Company 6:00
4:00 Toon Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood 4:30
4:30 Toon Big O 5:00
5:00 SciFi Caprica 6:00
5:00 AMC Backlash 7:00
5:00 Toon InuYasha 5:00
5:00 TCM Smilin’ Through 7:00

Bonus!  9 Hours of Law & Order!

Ghost in the Shell will be running an Olympics related episode- Ag2O.

Smilin’ Through is the 1932 version with Norma Shearer and Fredric March.

Stage Door stars Katharine Hepburn, Ginger Rogers, Adolphe Menjou, Gail Patrick, Constance Collier, Andrea Leeds, Samuel S. Hinds, and Lucille Ball.

This part still under construction, expect updates.

All of them far more worth your eyeballs than NBC and its horrible coverage.

This isn’t even political, except for the lesson in activism.

Am I serious?

Dead serious.

Email- nbcolympicsfeedback@nbcuni.com

Oh Rose, have something to eat.

Two hundred thousand years in the future he’s dying, and there’s nothing I can do.

Well, like you said, two hundred thousand years, it’s way off!

But it’s not!  It’s now.  That fight is happening right now!  And he’s fighting for us, for the whole planet, and I’m just sitting here eating chips!

Listen to me!  God knows I have hated that man, but right now I love him, and do you know why?  Cause he did the right thing, he sent you back to me!

But what do I do every day, Mum?  What do I do?  Get up, catch the bus, go to work, come back home, eat chips and go to bed, is that it?!

It’s what the rest of us do.

But I can’t!

Why, cause you’re better than us??

NO, I didn’t mean that!  I just…  But it was.  It was a better life!

And I don’t mean all the travelling, and seeing aliens and spaceships and things, that don’t matter.

The Doctor showed me a better way of living your life.  You know, he showed you too!

That you don’t just give up!  You don’t just let things happen!

You make a stand, you say no, you have the guts to do what’s right when everyone else just runs away.

I want to make it very clear that you can use this thread to talk about the Olympics all you like.

I will be watching something else.

And you’re perfectly free to post your own essay, I might even promote it.

But to those who say that it doesn’t matter, that now that NBC has its advertisers ratings mean nothing, you couldn’t be more wrong.  They have guaranteed those advertisers a certain number of eyeballs and if NBC doesn’t make their numbers they have to give their sponsors free advertising until they do.

You have power.  You just have to have the willpower to use it.

19 comments

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  1. The next section covers 1:00 to 6:00 and I’m a little behind on the commentary.  Expect an Afternoon Update shortly.

    Health and Fitness from TheMomCat at 4, Afternoon Edition at 5.

  2. rings me with this urgent update-

    Apparently the US Team has bailed on the Nationals and World Championships!

    Quitters.

    In his words- “No better than Sara Palin.”

    • Shahryar on February 27, 2010 at 7:02 pm

    I hate the Hollywood ending even more than I hate short track ice skating.

     

    • TMC on February 27, 2010 at 11:49 pm

    on USA from 6 PM until midnight. Burn Notice repeats latest episode from Thursday. I love Fiona.

    A&E has “The Green Mile” I’m not a big Tom Hanks fan. At 8 PM “Gone in Sixty Seconds”

    • TMC on February 28, 2010 at 1:18 am

    Gold USA

    Silver Germany

    Bronze Canada

    • TMC on February 28, 2010 at 2:25 am

    Canada has a nearly insurmountable lead over Norway going into the 10th end. Canada 9/Norway 3. Should Canada win, they will be undefeated, the first men’s curling team to do so. Go Canada.

    • TMC on February 28, 2010 at 2:34 am

    Wins Gold Medal in Men’s Curling..undefeated. Well done.

  3. Canada 6   Norway 3

    http://www.vancouver2010.com/o

    The Canadian home crowd sang Oh Canada during the last period.

    The Norwegian skip Thomas Ulsrud smiled at the Canadians when they won when the crowd went nuts. Class act.  They have the silver.  

  4. … marching in with the Canadian flag

    Congratulations, Canadian Curlers for your gold medal !

    Congratulations, Swiss Curlers on the bronze, and Norway for the silver and your unique pants !

  5. its over now, & Im not sure the channel (MoviePLex?) …sorry. Anyway if you come across it, its worth watching, good cast.  Marvin’s Room w Meryl Streep, Diane Keaton & Leo Dicaprio. 1996.

    • TMC on February 28, 2010 at 3:31 am

    to perform in the closing ceremony. Well they are popular but they do have their critics especially Chad Kroeger whis ahs been described as

    the second worst singer of all time, behind Scott Stapp of Creed saying: “Nickelback’s frontman may not have invented that post-grunge moose-in-heat bellow he relies on, but nobody does it better than he does. And by better, I mean worse”

    • TMC on February 28, 2010 at 4:15 am

    won by Italy by Giuliano Razzoli whose mentor and idol http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A… Albeto Tomba] was on hand to watch his Gold Medal run. Tomba was the last Italian to win the Slalom in the Olympics in 1988. Tomba took the Silver in 1992 and 1994.

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