The Texture of Your Balls

(6 pm. – promoted by ek hornbeck)

(An imagined interview by a sick individual)

Reporter: Tom can you determine the difference in your balls inflation?

Tom: I like my balls in the lower range.

Reporter: Who determines the range Tom?

Tom: I do. I know when my balls feel the most comfortable. Of course I do have others that feel my balls. When I say “feel my balls” i mean that I determine the correct pressure and show others the tightness I prefer.

Reporter: You stated earlier that you are handed the balls, correct?

Who hands you your balls?

Tom: I have a ball guy.

Reporter: Is this “ball guy” the only one that handles your balls?

Tom: Well no there is usually a few referees and the halfback likes to handle them, there are also the receivers that like to get the feel of them. Before gametime of course.

Reporter: Does anyone touch your balls at halftime?

Tom: Usually only my ball guy but last week I am told someone touched my balls.

Reporter: Can you tell when others touch your balls?

Tom: Only Giselle