Planet Shit Dispatch: American Idiot Edition

You know who is bitter in America? I am. Because shit-kickers voted twice for a retarded guy they wanted to have a beer with, and everybody else had to suffer the consequences!

-Bill Maher

The bubba vote? What a fucking hoot! Newsweek magazine just continues to amaze in their increasingly successful quest to become America’s predominant tabloid shitrag. This week’s cover story is laughingly entitled Obama’s Bubba Gap and flogs the latest Clinton slime machine storyline that the magical mulatto empty suit is failing to attract the same dumb motherfucker demographic who were largely responsible for giving us the eight year running pox on western civilization that is the George W. Bush soft dictatorship.

The Clintons are really fixated on bagging their limit of unsophisticated rubes with the tired charge that Obama is some sort of high falutin, nappy headed version of John Kerry, an effete snob and an ivory tower elitist who some slobbering white trash freak wouldn’t want to have a beer with. He is just a prissy boy with no ‘testicular fortitude’ who doesn’t throw down shots of whiskey at photo ops and can’t bowl worth a damn, but I sure as hell bet that he can wind surf and is a living god when it comes to polo.

This is just phase 26 of the ‘kitchen sink strategy’ designed by a vengeful woman scorned in the aftermath of that Super Tuesday so long ago to keep moving the goalposts down the field, paying off the refs and making the ball carrier face repeated flagrant fouls on the way to the end zone. Like some grotesque running of the gauntlet designed to exact the maximum amount of damage because the ultimate sin in Murka is bucking the system. I brings to mind the great and eerily prophetic 70’s movie Rollerball in which Jonathan E. refuses to retire and faces the ultimate death match of a game with no rules, no time limit and a sole purpose of publicly killing him because he had the audacity to believe that he was bigger than the ‘game’.

A lot of those 70’s movies have a lot of relevance today when viewed again because let’s face it, people really had their shit together a lot more back then and were scared fucking shitless of what this country was becoming. Rollerball was about the corporatization of the planet, the elimination of any actual wars and the mass opiate game that kept the masses in line, I would strongly recommend it to anyone who hasn’t seen it and don’t waste your time with the silly remake. Soylent Green is looking more and more like the work of great work of vision too with the current world food crisis, global warming, over population and borderline anarchy. How long is it going to be before some corporate genius comes up with the great solution that wraps up everything in one great bundled solution for all of our current problems?

Hell, the prototype program is already out there just waiting to take on some of that great added value that Wall Street looters cream their suits over and of course like so many other nefariously anti-American things like web censorship, bioweapons, military arms and vaccines is it being test marketed in a country without the civil liberties protections that even our now picked clean constitution offers us here in Der Heimat.

It was recently revealed that the Chinese government (you know, the human rights abusing chinks sponsoring the idiotic corporate Olympics this summer) is utilizing mobile execution units or ‘death vans’ to dispatch with criminals and more than likely in keeping with tradition, other enemies of the state including any dissidents that are not destined for slave labor factories to produce cheap shit for export to your local Wal-Mart.

The old Stalin era Russians sent out bread trucks at night to haul off dissidents, the Nazi’s used buses with non-threatening silhouettes of people painted onto the windows so as to not appear menacing in order to more easily lure their victims into vehicles that were specially designed to asphyxiate the occupants with exhaust fumes, could it be that there will be big yellow smiley faces painted on the vans when they are rolled out here in the USA? As with Google and Microsoft who are currently using China as a market in which they can beta test internet censorship software before the imminent U.S. rollout it is probably only a matter of time until there is a death van coming very soon to a location near you. And since you are out here acting as a subversive blogger in the Bushreich’s surveillance state rest assured that YOU will likely already be on the pick up list.

On being confronted with the gruesome truth about the new state fleet Chinese officials were positively Pennesque and Rovian in their shameless explanation that the vans actually represented a more humane means of performing executions rather than the traditional use of firing squads and for good measure further justified the new program by saying that it actually benefits the poor per the following excerpt from a 2006 USA Today story:

Makers of death vans say they save money for poor localities that would otherwise have to pay to construct execution facilities in prisons or court buildings. The vans ensure that prisoners sentenced to death can be executed locally, closer to communities where they broke the law.

My God that sounds so Murkan that it sends a cold chill running up my spine. Just how quickly do you think that the one party rulership of this country would jump at the opportunity to introduce legislation to roll out the newest weapon in the ‘Global War on Terror’ to deal with all of those sleeper cells of secular humanist, al-Qaeda worshipping, godless, gay loving liberals? And guess which company will probably get the no-bid contract? If you guessed the same one that was recently awarded $385 million to construct ‘temporary detention facilities’ you are already more of a danger to the state than you might realize.

But wait, there’s more. The truly ghoulish part of this horrible tale is that the death vans are staffed with medical professionals who after performing the execution by lethal injection then proceed to harvest the victim’s organs which are put up for sale and the bodies are being driven immediately to a crematorium before relatives are allowed to view the decesaed or otherwise investigate. According to Amnesty International, the same world human rights organization that incurred the wrath of the Bushist government for their condemnation of our new national right to torture and maintain a gulag system:

Injections leave the whole body intact and require participation of doctors. Organs can “be extracted in a speedier and more effective way than if the prisoner is shot,” says Mark Allison, East Asia researcher at Amnesty International in Hong Kong. “We have gathered strong evidence suggesting the involvement of (Chinese) police, courts and hospitals in the organ trade.

Executions in death vans are recorded on video and audio that is played live to local law enforcement authorities – a measure intended to ensure they are carried out legally.

China’s refusal to give outsiders access to the bodies of executed prisoners has added to suspicions about what happens afterward: Corpses are typically driven to a crematorium and burned before relatives or independent witnesses can view them.

Chinese authorities are sensitive to allegations that they are complicit in the organ trade. In March, the Ministry of Health issued regulations explicitly banning the sale of organs and tightening approval standards for transplants.

Even so, Amnesty International said in a report in April that huge profits from the sale of prisoners’ organs might be part of why China refuses to consider doing away with the death penalty.

What a great idea for the mutated form of capitalism/fascism that is so popular in the world among the globalists today and the vans can also one day be used to facilitate the elimination of the unfit so that the entire Social Darwinist process can be accelerated. The organ market represents yet another opportunity for money to be made, you can bet that Wall Street will go absolutely bonkers over the profit potential and the futures market will explode faster than you can say Thurston Howell III. Aren’t the wonders of the fucking free market grand?

There is a marvelously sick serendipity in the possibility of the death vans hitting the domestic market at exactly the same time when civil liberties are disappearing, secret arrests are looming, the death penalty is being expanded and Haliburton is constructing concentration camps for ‘future programs’ yet to be defined, people are getting hungrier by the day and with the U.S. manufacturing base having been gutted the bean counters are desperately looking for a new export product other than toxic financial shit bombs.

Could Soylent Red, White and Blue be coming soon?

But I digress….

We have come to where the highest qualification for the presidency is the abilty to successfully pander to the white trash aka the Hoosier state vote, a bunch of ignorant racist hicks who worship Larry Bird, just Midwestern versions of the same dumb, beer swilling, testosterone reeking dipshits who were largely responsible for George W. Bush and the by proxy ass fucking of the rest of America. It was pretty damned funny when this little story came out that Clinton hack Mickey Kantor is in the political classic movie on the 1992 Bubba For President campaign War Room referring to those pasty white inbred idiots in Indiana that are now being hornswoggled as get this – “white niggers”! The actual quote attributed to Kantor is “How would you like to be a worthless white nigger?” Now that is piss your pants hilarious but Bill O’Reilly won’t be asking the Queen about that one during her next hot session of dry humping on Rupert Murdoch’s right-wing propaganda pulpit will he? This is as astoundingly humorous a bit of true honesty as when Jack Abramoff referred to the rubber fetus crowd as the bunch of ingorant, knuckledragging morons that they are an email that was exposed a few years back. I say that Hillary has one set of brass balls to accuse Obama of being an elitist with yuppie pricks like Kantor on the staff.

Does Hillary shave her pits? Why does Michella Obama hate America? Where’s his Merkin flag pin, is she really a hermaphrodite? just how are them hoop shootin’ local white boys at the local all American John Cougar Fucking Mellencamp little foreclosed on pink houses small town high school going to do this year? That is about as sophisticated as it gets for the dumbest fucking collection of white trash corn fed, pumpkin patch peckerwoods north of the Mason Dixon Line. Shit yeah, we have no jobs, the double-wide is in pre-foreclosure and the kids are going to bed cold and hungry but goddamit we are gonna wage us a proxy war against that uppity high fallutin darkie and all of his Muslim buddies.

And no amount of the empty suit’s damnation of Reverend Wright is going to do one fucking thing to change the mind of the ‘nigger hating white niggers’ when it comes down to it, they will all obediently goosestep to their polling places come November and cast their votes for John McCain.

The shit-kickers and rubes will once again be the ones who ultimately make the choice come November, they will swallow the same bullshit in a slightly different package and the rest of us will continue to suffer the consequences of living in a country with such an overwhelming amount of willfully ignorant, easily suckered morons.

I am beginning to strongly suspect that we are all doomed to be fucked!

God Bless America!