White Fear, White Ignorance, White Guilt

Yesterday was a very trying day. I found myself in a political fight with a co-worker I used to consider a friend.  Normally we all pretty much agree on what is right. This time has been different in so much as Hillary was in the mix and now I find out John McCain as well. Follow me beneath the fold for how reasonably intelligent people are rejecting Obama. I have question, lots of questions.

The episode started in the morning when there was something a the TV about Rev. Wright and co-workers remark what a racist crazy jerk he is. Well couldn’t let that pass. I don’t feel Wright is crazy or a racist, he had a melt down at the Press Club and who could blame him, not me.

She added. Well he is racist against whites because Blacks aren’t the only ones who have been abused, Grandfather’s house was burned down because he was Italian.

Not the same thing and here is why. Your ancestors came thru Ellis Island, they were not brought here against their will in chains, crammed in cargo holds of ships. Your relatives were never sold on the auction block like livestock, or kept like farm animals. Your relatives eventually acclimated and got a hold of the American dream. Blacks have lived in this country since 1619, nearly 400 years and still have little opportunity. Your relatives were never hunted and lynched for sport, or forbidden to learn how to read or write, ride on the back of the bus, denied a decent education or used for medical experiments by the government. All of this was done to them for US, by WHITE people. We don’t get to judge the validity of their grievances or their anger, we just don’t. Nor do we get to use the experiences of our family to denigrate their very real suffering. We can witness in horror at what was done, we can have empathy, we can search to solve the issues of racism in this country but we can never ever understand the way they do, or be experts on their history or experiences in this country because we didn’t live them.

Shut everyone up until that afternoon when I got an email from another co-worker, the one I thought of as a friend, someone I consider both smart and decent. It reaffirmed Wright was a racist etc. So I asked if she actually knew anything about the Reverend. She knew a little and she didn’t trust Obama and as for me, I don’t know anything about Blacks because I have never lived in THAT culture. She was voting for McCain. I was stunned, just stunned. She is right, I have never lived in THAT culture, trust me she hasn’t either, whatever THAT means. She is very vocal about the war, bashing Bush at every opportunity, she is also very religious, Catholic like I am. We have a lot of things in common, raised our children on our own, both of us have children with seizures and a grandson born under less than optimum circumstance. She is also in her early 40’s and I am in my mid 60’s. Neither of the people involved in this, the other is barely 30, remember civil rights or so many of the things Wright talked about.

It is also possible she is voting for McCain just because he is pro-life, so much for the 500,000 or so dead Iraqi children, guess they don’t count.

I believe she voted for Bush as well even tho she believes he is the devil simply because he is pro-life. Trust me I can argue that shocking piece of hypocracy ’til the cows come home and will relish every nanosecond of it.

I don’t understand her distrust of Obama, her thing about THAT culture. I have never seen anything in THAT culture you aren’t going to find in mine.  Is it fear and if so why. Is it fear that joins with guilt because the Black community bares our injustices with far more grace than we deserve? Or is it just plan old dumb as rocks ignorance. Lets talk. I really need how to combat this. She isn’t going to convince very many people to vote for McCain because he is pro-life, when in fact he like Bush are pro-death.

But the Obama thing has me worried because that might get some traction.

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  1. is that, in a way, you could frame it to her that you both agree.

    You said

    We can witness in horror at what was done, we can have empathy, we can search to solve the issues of racism in this country but we can never ever understand the way they do, or be experts on their history or experiences in this country because we didn’t live them.

    And she said

    She knew a little and she didn’t trust Obama and as for me, I don’t know anything about Blacks because I have never lived in THAT culture.

    So you are both saying that its hard to see things from a Black person’s perspective.

    Just a guess, but when someone is willing to potentially sacrifice a friendship over this, it might have to do with some negative experiences with Black people that she’s harboring – or at least experiences that she has come to blame on Black people. If that’s true and she could say those out in the open and begin to talk about it…it might help.  

    • TomP on May 9, 2008 at 00:42

    the issues as Obama is, if he is nominated, we need to work to help him defeat McCain.

    Some people will look for reasons for reject him.  But explaining that Obama is not Rev. Wright might help with those with an open mind.  I like some of what Rev. Wright said, and disagree with some, but folks unfamiliar with African Ameircan activists (which is many white folks) likely will not understand.  Better to point to Obama’s actual words.

    I think it will be a close race with McCain whether it is Obama or Clinton.  For those who see themselves as left of center, which seems to be a minority in the Democratic party, i.e., progressive populists, I think we need to support the center (HillObama) against the right, but not uncritically.  We can work for and support Obama, but we must press our own issues: out of Iraq; real action on global warming; ameliorating the Great Class Stratification; universal health care; really growing a labor movement; a blue/green alliance, etc.  

  2. …you lost her?  It isn’t really my business, so I won’t go into it if you don’t want me to.

    • jim p on May 9, 2008 at 04:09

    the American Church has pushed abortion much much more than the War or Social Justice.

    she is also very religious, Catholic like me

    This is why someone close to me left the Church. She loved the Pastor, a man of great compassion and intellect, yet she couldn’t get him to talk against the War in his Church.

    There is a large part of the laity that emotionally evaluates, and reacts to, abortion as you or I would to a murder. I’m not sure there’s a way to change that. Perspective?

    Maybe the argument would be that McCain wants to attack Iran, and with nuclear bunker busters. He sings “bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran” in public without shame. According to a Union of Concerned Scientists study http://www.ucsusa.org/global_s

    A simulation of [a bunker buster] used against the Esfahan nuclear facility in Iran, using the software developed for the Pentagon, showed that 3 million people would be killed by radiation within 2 weeks of the explosion, and 35 million people in Afghanistan, Pakistan and India would be exposed to increased levels of cancer-causing radiation (see Figure 1).[4]

    They don’t say it, but common sense says there’s going to be a lot of still-births and damaged births going along with that.

    Yes. Perspective.

    Unless she’s just a racist, in which case killing all those foreigners won’t matter anyway. Then maybe rebut with, “but that nuclear cloud is going to make it’s way here, that’s just the way weather works. So how many Americans are you willing to accept as collateral damage?”

  3. and that is exactly where it goes wrong… “not the same thing”

    and that has to be part of our strategy. but there must be proportionality. it is not and has never been a level playing field. these things must be acknowledged.

    obama’s message is not in conflict with rev. wright’s. it’s just different.

    i’m tired now and can’t put it together; i’ll finish tomorrow.

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