Today the President now has a dog. I like dogs! Dogs are cute when they are little but are still fun when they grow up. If you are good your dog will teach you to do tricks like throw sticks for them and take them for walks.
Also, four bad men kidnapped a guy from a boat. Then they wouldn’t give him back, so we killed them. Republicans said that the President wouldn’t kill them, but he did! That will show those Republicans!
Republicans are also bad in other ways!Republicans are going to protest in the street because thy don’t like the what they think the President is doing!
Hahahaha! What kind of idiot goes and protests in the street when they don’t like their government???!!!??? Stoopid Republicans. But even though the Republicans are bad and stoopid, we must still fear them!
We cannot do things that are smart or right, because the stoopid bad Republicans will call us bad names on tv. That would mean that we can’t do good things anymore. So we have to not do good things…or else the bad, stoopid Republicans will go on tv and call us names for doing good things, so we can’t do good things.
So everybody who wants the president to do good things better be quiet. If we tell the president we want him to do good things, that he can’t do, because of the scary bad stoopid Republicans you are just falling into the bad stoopid scary Republican trap where they try to make you do good things so they can call you bad names on the tv.
Or even, also….they could stand up in the Senate and say no. And when the scary bad stoopid Republicans stand up and say no….they mean it! Not like the Democrats when they were in exactly the same position as the scary bad stoopid Republicans! When they stood up and said no to that Bush guy, he still did bad stuff. Cause, I guess, they didn’t really mean it…or weren’t as scary and bad and stoopid as the Republicans. Because when the scary bad stoopid Republicans say stuff we have to do it, even if it is scary and bad. But when the Democrats say we have to do good stuff, we can’t do it. Or they will say bad stuff on…..wait! They already say bad stuff on tv about the Democrats every day! They even make stuff up and nobody even says nothing about it!
MY bad, I better correct that or I will be a bad person too, for saying stuff, ok, here we go!
UPDATE: We can’t do good stuff or the scary bad stoopid Republicans will go on tv and say…..even MORE bad scary stuff!
So we better just do what they want.And not do any good stuff. Good thing we are smarter than them! We figured out just in time that we better not do good stuff and still let them do bad stuff or we might fall into their trap and not be able to do anything good!
DARN those scary bad stoopid Republicans for making us stop doing good stuff like that. Boy are THEY stoopid hahahahaha!
Pressure the Press, and or Free The Press, and or whatever else we may end up calling it, starts tomorrow!