Be sure to thank Socialism for the public fireworks today

( – promoted by buhdydharma )

Crossposted at Daily Kos

   If you witness a state, county or town fireworks display this Independence Day, you have enjoyed the fruits of American socialism.

Social welfare, public programs and any service that is not performed to make a profit have often been sold to the uninformed, feeble minded and people who do not read books with big words as Socialism.  Why, everywhere you look there is socialism. From the public water fountain that does not require quarters to operate, to the fireworks going off over your head this evening, everywhere this Independence day you can find a small bit of what some people call “Socialism” free for your benefit and enjoyment.

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   That’s right.

   What an amazing country we live in!

   Help celebrate America’s rich social history with me below the fold.

    From the army that keeps the evil terrorists at bay to the recycling center that keeps the streets from being filled with the beer cans left over from your independence day celebration, social programs effect us in many positives ways. Even kids are getting into the act through the little league baseball team your town hosts for your children. What many call socialism today is actually a time honored tradition in American history.

   Whether it is the EMS worker who is giving you the Heimlich at your family outing or the Constitutional Army we celebrate this day that was paid with Federal funds, you can see the government spending that is necessary to a fully functioning society all around you.

   “But isn’t Government spending the same thing as socialism?” Billy asks.

   Of course not, you idiot. That is what is called a social program, but you should think of it as a perk that comes with living in such an awesome free society.

   Yay!

   Independence day, as you may know, is a day where America as a nation celebrates the independence we won from the British king who wished to profit off of the colonial American colonies without investing in America’s social welfare as well.

   This is known as “No taxation without representation.”

Today, this scenario is still being played out. At Corporate sponsored “Tea Bagger” parties, many Americans will confuse this holiday we celebrate as a nation for a chance to protest the fact that taxes must be paid in order for America to exist as it does today.

   Having been misled to believe that they are billionaires and Multinational Corporations, this nearly all white crowd of ignorant Americans of all income levels will protest on behalf of the wealthiest among them, in order to create the impression that real Americans only need the free market to make themselves truly free.

   You see, if the private sector was supposed to provide everything in our society profit was the only motive in human existence, there would be no water fountains, fire hydrants, policemen, ambulance drivers, or even the public school that you attended was underfunded, otherwise you would already know this.

   These people are so stupid, they could not see the benefits of a strong social program if it was exploding right over their heads.

    On a day of national celebration, the people who organize these protests and the fools who attend are trolling for dissent, based on an elitist corporate partisan agenda.

    And we all know that you should never feed a troll.

If you encounter any of these mostly white and totally misinformed protests you should not engage them. Do not feed the trolls.

Rather, stand away at a good distance and photograph their stupidity. Later, mocking the pictures can provide hours of cheap entertainment for family and friends.

    Also, making your own protest sign that mocks their protest and stand on the other side of the street can be a clever and fun way to show your misinformed countrymen how badly they have failed.

    As a last resort, if you must engage a crowd of teabagging dittoheads, show you dominant nature as the alpha predator. Do not show fear or turn your back to your opponent.

Often, a well aimed shoe thrown at the biggest, loudest idiot among them can effectively assert the reality that they suck, and the freedom fought for by our parents who sacrificed for our society in order to preserve that freedom truly kicks ass.

   So, on this Independence day, if you are sharing a meal with someone, doing some act of random not for profit kindness for a fellow patriot, or just enjoying some good old public fireworks displays, rest assured in the fact that you are a socialist pig who hates freedom and hopes the terrorists will win, and you should be investigated for holding Un American beliefs and tortured into making a confession, you godless commie traitor.

     Enjoy the free fireworks and drive safe.

     Happy Independence day!

Cheers,

MoT