“Holder Joins Conyers in Demanding Action”

David Swanson this morning…

House Judiciary Committee Chairman John Conyers has called on Attorney General Eric Holder to open a criminal investigation into the misdeeds of former president George W. Bush and former vice president Richard B. Cheney.

Holder, in turn, has now called on Conyers to open impeachment proceedings against former head of the Office of Legal Council Jay Bybee, now a judge in the Ninth Circuit.

Conyers, in response, has demanded that Holder open a complete investigation of 14 different areas of criminal enterprise and appoint an independent counsel, offering a list of eight possible candidates.

Holder, in reply, has insisted that Conyers reissue all of the subpoenas his committee has failed to enforce over the past two and a half years and use the Capitol Police to enforce them at once.

In response, Conyers’ office has issued a new report on the need to weed out corruption and undo politically motivated prosecutions by the U.S. Department of Justice.

This morning, the attorney general remarked at a televised press conference, “Chairman Conyers proposed five months ago to extend to 10 years the statutes of limitations on crimes allegedly committed under the previous administration. Introducing a bill might be a way to begin making that happen. Just an idea. I’m no expert.”

Surprisingly, John Conyers removed a large Easter bonnet that had been disguising him, stood up in the back of the room and shouted: “Mr. Attorney General, the former vice president of the United States confesses to authorizing torture every time he leaves his house. You are required by law to indict him. Are you waiting for Marc Rich’s permission?”

Attorney General Holder cut him off, declaring from the microphone at the podium: “The distinguished gentleman has spent the past three years refusing to enforce subpoenas or attempt impeachments, making a laughing stock of one branch of government, and now wants another branch to act on the basis of his reports as if we can’t do our own thinking and must employ the U.S. Congress as a think tank. Does he imagine we don’t know that torture is against the law?”

Conyers, age 80, stood on a chair and announced: “Mr. Attorney General, the vice president’s house is about two miles across the river and I would be delighted to point it out to you.”

Holder appeared to consider this momentarily before replying: “Chairman Conyers, it has been over a year since you subpoenaed Mr. Cheney. If you’ve given your Mapquest directions for his house to the Capitol Police and they haven’t found it yet, something must be defective.”

“You’re scared,” was Conyers’ startling reply.

“No, you are,” was the remarkable response from the attorney general.

The press conference continued to degenerate, and recounting the rest would serve no clear purpose other than embarrassment.

13 comments

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    • Edger on July 26, 2009 at 4:37 pm
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    🙂

  1. Thanks, Edger!

    Two pots calling the kettles black!!!!!

    Quid pro quo!!!!  Stalemate!!  So, does this mean that nothing will happen until one or the other takes the first step “forward?”

    Aw, backbone, I love it.

  2. I just canceled a whole comment ending with Why did Conyers have on a bonnet? Shows how absurd the posturing has become.  

  3. Millions of Amercians worked to have Cheney and Bush Impeached. Most of us thought we could trust and count on Rep. John Conyers to start Impeachment Hearings as soon as he became Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee in January of 2007.

    We even delivered to Rep. Conyers a petition with over 1,100,000 signatures asking him to start Impeachment Hearings.

    The 80 year old congressman who has been in office for 40+ years used to have a great liberal reputation. Conyers has been described as the “powerful Chairman of the Judiciary Committee” but has accomplished very little in protecting our Constitution from the ravages of the Bush-Cheney Administration or bringing violators of our Federal Anti-Torture Laws to justice.

    His House Committee is where the Impeachment Process had to be started.

    Conyers has been a big disappointment to Impeachment and Torture Accountability Advocates. He portrayed himself as the Champion of Impeachment in the House, but blocked Impeachment for years and kept Rep. Kucinich’s Bush-Cheney Impeachment Bills from ever being seriously debated in his committee or voted on.

    Conyers accepted an IMPEACHMENT PETITION SIGNED BY 1.1 MILLION VOTERS but IGNORED IT AND HAD THOSE DELIVERING IT ARRESTED. He never mentioned the 1.1 Million Signature Petition after that day.

    Strange behavior from the “Champion of Impeachment”.

    Conyers is on the board of Progressive Democrats Of America but even they can’t get him to do his duty.

    Now we see in the Washington Post that a “Conservative Group Calls For Probe Of Conyers – Wife’s Case Raises Disclosure Issue” http://tr.im/uezF

    and in the Detroit newspapers that Rep. Conyers could be involved in his wife’s Federal Bribery Conviction.  

    “Riddle implicates Rep. John Conyers in wife’s corruption troubles”

    http://tinyurl.com/mkxftx

    “What did Rep. John Conyers know?”

    http://tinyurl.com/mp9t4l

    “Rep. John Conyers not talking about waste-well letter.-Explanation asked for shift”

    http://tinyurl.com/lczr6q

    “Rep. John Conyers defends switching position on toxic wells”

    http://tinyurl.com/nhqnnu

    “Rep. Conyers’ office defends flip-flop”

    http://tinyurl.com/mdd3sv

    Perhaps given Conyers age, poor performance holding the Bush-Cheney criminals to account And his possible involvement in his wife’s Bribery Scandal we should not expect Rep. Conyers to do anything we want. Oh, but that would be absurd. He took an Oath to protect our Constitution. Pelosi should replace him as Chairman.

    If HJC Chairman Conyers does not soon start hearings in his Committee on the crimes of the Bush Administration

    WE Must Call For His Resignation.

    SIGN THE PETITIONS

    Demanding

    both a Commission of Inquiry

    and a Special Prosecutor

    For All Their Crimes

    at                        ANGRYVOTERS.ORG



    http://ANGRYVOTERS.ORG

    We must hang in there…

    or our children or grandchildren may

    be tortured and imprisoned without cause because of our failure.

    .

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