Good Lord, what a bunch of jackasses

What a bunch of jackasses.  

These people are not only incredibly stupid, they think we’re even more stupid than they are.

And they might be right.

Check this shit out:

US says bin Laden sometimes slips into Afghanistan

Oh REEEEEAAALLY?  

Let’s see how this is working here.  The Pentagon crook Robert Gates has decided that in spite of a majority of Americans “lacking the resolve” to “perservere” and “win at all costs” in Afghanistan, has decided to have some stupid lackey tell us that hey, you know, sometimes Osama bin Laden actually crosses the border and ENTERS Afghanistan.

He could be there right now!   He could be!  I mean, prove that he’s not!  I’ll bet you five bucks he’s there right now!   And and and if he does, and we’re bombing Afghanistan when he walks into it, he might walk into one of our bombs and and and then he’d be, like, dead!  ‘Cause we’d blow him up!  

What a childish bunch of douchebags.

Do they have any evidence of this?

No.

Is there any intelligence that might actually support such speculation?

No.

Is this anything other than a wild guess?

No.

Is it pure unadulterated bullshit?

Yes.

I could just as easily get up on a podium in front of the press and swear that I’m pretty sure Ken Lay is alive and well and living in a Penthouse suite in Reno.  Have I actually seen him?  No.   Do I have any evidnece he’s there?   No.   Then why would I say such a thing?   Because he could be there.   It’s possible!


Asked on CNN’s “State of the Union” whether the administration has reliable intelligence on bin Laden’s whereabouts, Jones replied, “The best estimate is that he is somewhere in North Waziristan, sometimes on the Pakistani side of the border, sometimes on the Afghan side of the border.”

Yeah, and sometimes he’s at the Taco Bell in Kandahar.  I mean, why not?  He could be.   That’s a “guess”, too, right up there with his “best guess”.   What makes one “guess” better than another “guess?”

Jones did not comment on the intelligence behind that estimate, nor did he cite a time period or describe more specifically bin Laden’s apparent border crossings.

That’s because he doesn’t have any intelligence.  Of any kind.  The kind in your brain that makes you smart, or the kind that gives you information.

Gates told ABC’s “This Week” that “we don’t know for a fact where Osama bin Laden is,” although he agreed that his likely location is North Waziristan.

Yeah, and who told you that, Gates?  The Osama fairy?  

Obama administration officials have often asserted, as did the Bush administration, that they believe bin Laden is being sheltered on the Pakistani side of the border, along with other senior al-Qaida leaders. But Jones broke new ground by saying publicly that the al-Qaida chief may at times have slipped back into Afghanistan.

Oh good, they believe it.   Well my son believes that Santa Claus lives on the North Pole, and I think that both are about as likely.

I quit believing in Santa Claus when I was eight years old, and I quit believing in the Osama Bin Boogeyman a few years ago, too.  Both are myths designed to manipulate people into behaving certain ways.  My son will jump through all KINDS of hoops when I tell him stories about Santa Claus.   It feel kinda guilty, but we do it to everybody, right?

Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., made a somewhat similar, if less specific, remark Sunday about bin Laden’s movements. He told NBC’s “Meet the Press” that knowledgeable people have told him that bin Laden “moves back and forth.”

Yeah, and he does pilates every morning, too.  And brushes his teeth with the bones of a dead secretary from 9/11.  

Have you seen that movie “Idiocracy”?   This country is actually turning into that.

“Squirrel!!”

34 comments

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    • Inky99 on December 7, 2009 at 11:56 am
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    essays and comments over at DK, and I have to say the world got a whole lot dumber just in the last year or so.

    The intelligence is dropping with the value of the dollar, although I think have more hope for the dollar than the fools.  

    • Edger on December 7, 2009 at 2:18 pm

    You know the guy’s an invisible shapeshifter, has super powers, can walk right through mountains in a single step, flies planes with remote control mind beams, is as strong as a team of camels, carries a big spool on his back with twenty-five thousand miles of tubing rolled up on it connected to a kidney dialysis machine in the Mayo Clinic, can raise himself from the dead anytime he wants to, and hides in Gates’s closet at night…

    He could be anywhere. You know this, right?

    We have to bomb the entire surface of the earth to be safe.

  1. this stuff is laughingly transparent and obvious.

    Months ago, I often commented “how stupid do they think we are?” … I think the answer to that question has become quite apparent: Awfully goddam stupid.

    (the definition of “we” once again, being qualified)

    • banger on December 7, 2009 at 6:16 pm

    Who the hell is he? I’ll tell you who he is. He is a little marker they trot out now and then. As if we lived in a world where one person (the One) makes that much difference. I have seen no evidence about anything concerning OBL. I personally think he is a semi-rogue Saudi/Pakistani intelligence asset. That from all that I’ve been able to find out, is the only possible explanation. Not because I’m indulging in CT but because I know something about Arab culture that Americans don’t understand very well.

    Arabs have an intricate, sophisticated and tightly woven social life. Unlike the West the Islamic world developed in other directions than war, conquest and greed. It evolved a series of family alliances that are able to withstand a lot of storms. Every community has a Sheik or an Imman as well as elders that determine who gets married and who gets aid and how much from the community. It’s not cut and dried and I’m oversimplifying. But, let me put it this way. It is not possible, in my opinion, for 9/11 to have happened without the Saudi intel services knowing what was going to happen. Particularly because it has been so closely allied to ISI in Pakistan for decades which, in turn, helped create and aid the Taliban movement as we know it. OBL may have had little or nothing to do with 9/11 but he sure as hell was set up as a patsy even if he may not be.

    OBL is just a PR creation at this point. A brand, if you will. I don’t believe anything the government says about OBL, or anything else for that matter.

  2. Yo, Dude !

  3. He was Christmas shopping at the downtown mall. Heard he got into a scuffle over the last XBox. Think he’s a Guitar Hero fan?

    • Arctor on December 8, 2009 at 3:54 am

    Projected on the hate screen, now the criminal bin Laden has been seen in Afghanistan, next he may be in New Jersey, he’s everywhere you want to be: Precious!

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