My Political Bucket List

(Cross-posted from The Free Speech Zone)

1) Win an election solely on the platform that I will beat the fuck out of any politician that votes against funding for 9/11 related victims, returning troops, and sick children, with a Baseball bat while dressed as one of The Warriors.

2) Legalize Marijuana (Duh!)

3) Perform a “Statler and Waldorf” routine during the State of the Union with Bernie Sanders (after legalizing marijuana).

4) When in office, propose and get passed a change in parliamentary procedure that allows for the settling of a dispute between opposing sides only by way of “Thunderdome” Live on C-SPAN.

6) Get a free pass from the wife to bang Meghan McMcain on video wearing a Pirate Party t-shirt (with moneyshot ending) and only make the video available via torrent.

7) When a vote on Financial Reform is up and the lobbyists fill the Capitol, have Dennis Kucinich drive an electric dune buggy while I shoot them all with a paintball gun.  

2 comments

  1. for continuity of government.  The keys to 60 years of suppressed science and technology.  They know us peasants “Can’t Handle the Truth”.

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