Today’s Sign The Apocalypse Is Nigh

Yes, everything tastes better when it’s deep fried, including butter and boots, but does anyone think this is a good idea?

Hostess launches “Deep Fried Twinkies” as first frozen treat
By ANNE D’INNOCENZIO
Aug. 12, 2016 8:19 AM EDT

Hostess Brands, the maker of lunchbox treats like Ho Hos, is launching packaged “Deep Fried Twinkies” starting Friday that mark its first foray into frozen foods. The cream-filled snack in vanilla or chocolate is the result of a yearlong collaboration between Hostess and Wal-Mart, as both companies look to spark food sales with innovative products.

Battered and partially fried before being frozen, the Twinkies need to be finished for a short time in the oven, toaster oven or frying pan. They’ll cost $4.76 for a box of seven and for the first three months are available only at Wal-Mart.
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The Twinkie, long one of Hostess’ largest sellers, is a bigger business now than even right before the company filed for bankruptcy in 2012, Copaken said. Executives had considered developing a deep-fried version, like those seen at local fairs, but put the plans on hold until Wal-Mart approached them last summer.
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At nine grams of fat and 220 calories, the vanilla flavor of the Deep Fried Twinkies compares to 4 grams of fat and 130 calories in a regular Twinkie.
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Hot-dog chain Papaya King in New York sells them for $3 each, excluding tax, and they’re faring better than the deep-fried Oreos.
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When baked, the Deep Fried Twinkies do come out a bit crispy, but aren’t an exact match for the ones at fairs or restaurants.

“It’s really good. It’s delicious,” said construction worker Nick Severino of Yonkers, New York, who tasted a vanilla cream version.

Page Bondor, a Manhattan resident, wasn’t excited after trying it. “I like the original Twinkie,” she said. “This is a step too far.”

I mean, seriously, the damn things aren’t even deep fried, except at the factory, you bake them for 10 minutes to get the right level of crispiness and goo.

Because the United States doesn’t have enough lard and sugar in its diet. U-S-A! U-S-A!