Zombie Brains

Look, I’m a big fan of the Baseball Bat with or without Barbed Wire Decorations. The action is natural and smooth and you only need 40 foot pounds to satisfactorily dispatch a normal human (supernatural undead creatures requiring a bit more attention and effort) but there is the brain splatter problem I’m told you can avoid with low velocity high caliber ammo.

I’m not sure what the problem is with Louie Gohmert but I’m proud, proud I tell you, he’s representin’ the First District of Texas consisting largely of three small East Texas metropolitan areas— Lufkin-Nacogdoches, Longview-Marshall, and Tyler.

But apparently he done Zombified hissef’ and there’s no self respecting Concealed Carry Assault Rifle Totin’ Texan who can let him drag kids… Kids! … around the Capitol gettin’ them all Zombified with ideas like Democracy and Rights and such.

Republican refusing to self-quarantine spotting giving tour of the U.S. Capitol to Texas tourists
By Bob Brigham, Raw Story
March 9, 2020

Multiple Republicans are self-quarantining after potential exposure to COVID-19 coronavirus at the Conservative Political Action Convention (CPAC).

New White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX), Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ) and Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) have all started 14-day self-quarantines, as Trumpdemic trended on Twitter.

But Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) has refused to self-quarantine, despite being notified of potential exposure.

On Monday evening, Gohmert was spotting giving tours of the U.S. Capitol.

I’m afraid it’s a sign of the time I have to explain Zombies don’t exist and I don’t advocate violence or even prepping. I used to joke Reagan couldn’t tell the difference between a script and the news. It’s not a joke anymore.

But I am laughing. What else are you going to do?