Obama driving the Titanic

I confess, the angst and anger of the Obama supporters is killing me with laughter.

The latest outrage is over people’s outrage that President Obama has decided to institute a spending freeze.  “I mean, come on, we haven’t even HEARD the proposal yet.” they are crying.

So, for the intellectually-challenged folks that simply cannot figure it out on their own, I’m here to give the road map to the Obama super-secret-multidimensional-chess strategy.

And… I’m going to use the Titanic to show people this strategy.

Make George W. Bush the Captain of the Titanic.  He’s already put the ship on course to hit the iceberg and jumped ship with Dick Cheney.  Obama is made the new Captain.  There are many crisis occurring all at once, but, the ship is on a collision course with the iceberg.

Captain Obama gets told that the passengers don’t have enough food and Bush had opened the food stores to a certain few only.  Captain Obama liked that idea and pushed more food to the select few.  Now, food stores are low, people are still hungry… what does Captain Obama do next?  Why, he now wants to put a FREEZE on the food.  Yes, people are hungry, but, too many people are screaming that there is only so much food left, we just can’t afford to give out any more, to any one, for any reason.  What you have is what you get.

Captain Obama is told that a terrorist attacked the ship under Bush, so in response, anyone that someone turned in as a “terrorist” is now locked in the ships brig.  Don’t worry about evidence, innocence or guilt, because Bush said it was alright and he even had his lawyers write memo’s.  But, people now believe the brig is the scene of massive torture and abuses of the law.  What does Captain Obama do?  He says, “hey, it worked for THEM!” and not leaves the people in the brig, innocent or not, he decides to merely move the people from the brig to a stripped down stateroom where they can stay incarcerated, because, “hey, it’s not the brig!”

Captain Obama is told that the health of the people on ship isn’t the best and Bush did nothing about it.  He has a bold plan — give health care to everyone on the ship!  But, the wealthy throw a hissy, and, without fanfare, suddenly everyone on the ship has to BUY their health care, or, simply do without if they can’t afford it.  Amazingly, that is why the people didn’t get seen by the ship’s doctor in the first place; they couldn’t afford it!  But hey, if they MANDATE that everyone must pay or face a fine, he can call it “providing health care” to everyone.

While this is happening… the ship gets closer and closer to the iceberg.

Some of the more intellectual people bring to Captain Obama’s attention that if he doesn’t change the course of the ship, it will hit the iceberg and sink.  In fact, a MAJORITY of the people on the ship WANT him to change course.  But, when he because Captain, he brought in people that wrecked the Valdez and kept some people that helped Bush put the ship on course in the first place.  They tell him that there is nothing wrong, it’s business as usual, even though he stated he’d change course if he were the Captain.

And while this is happening… the ship gets closer and closer to the iceberg.

People are getting anxious now.  Captain Obama says he’ll hold a meeting the next day.  The Captain’s supporters throw a hissy fit that people are actually anxious about the situation and won’t even give him the courtesy of waiting a day to HEAR him out…

ALL WHILE THE SHIP KEEPS GETTING CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THAT DAMNED ICEBERG!

It doesn’t take a fucking genius to see that once it hits, the ship sinks, and then, they truly ARE in deep shit.

No waiting required….