I just ran into an interesting discussion over at Jack and Jill Politics about a column at Diversity, Inc. titled Why Whites Can’t Get Over Color. Apparently Luke Visconti has a regular column there titled “Ask the white guy” that I’m going to have to check into further…sounds interesting. These are the kinds of conversations that I think we need to be having.
Anyway, a woman writes in to say this (I’ll quote a bit, but please go check out the whole thing).
I am a white female and I can tell you that I don’t talk about blacks for fear I will be called a racist or be called to the table, especially in the workplace, for discrimination. We (whites), at my company, are not allowed to talk about blacks or any other ethnic group because we would get fired. I will say that whites are very sensitive now because we are discriminated against…
I love the fact that America is a big melting pot, full of color and different cultures. Why not embrace that instead of constantly bickering over it. We need to start looking into the future instead of constantly looking behind us and pointing the finger at people who were not even thought of in the times of slavery. Yes, it was a terrible thing to have happened to anyones ancestors but until we get over the past we will never fully get along. I teach my children not to see the color but to see the person. It is getting harder to do when all they hear about in the news, school, or articles is color. Get over the color! We are all Americans and instead of fighting between ourselves, we need to worry about turning our country back around. There are important issues out there that if we do not address them and come together, then we could say goodbye to our freedom.
I think this woman is saying what alot of white Americans think. And she’s getting to the heart of what racism often looks like in this country today. Here’s some of what “the white guy” says in response:
As a member of the baby boomer generation, I found your e-mail to be a real blast from the past: Your one e-mail covered most of the race-based malarkey I heard growing up. Questioning this dogma may lead you to a better place – it did for me…
Your demand that we “Get over the color!” is an expression of white privilege. It’s only possible to “get over” it if you are in the majority culture. Assuming you’re white, YOU can “get over the color!” but it’s simply not possible for people of color to get over who they are, what that means and the damage our society has purposefully done over the centuries by color.
You close with an illuminating contradiction. You can’t celebrate “color and different cultures” and embrace the “melting pot” at the same time. The “melting pot” is about subjugating your culture and forcing a person to “melt” into the white culture.
Melting who you are into a pot is not what makes a person American. What makes a person an American is embracing our Constitution, which empowers and protects our individual ability to remain ourselves.
I think the “white guy” pretty well nailed it. This woman, who is probably well-meaning, sounds very scared and insecure to me. I think we can give her some credit because at least she took the risk to write about her feelings and hopefully listen to the response. Something that alot of people aren’t willing to do.
But yes, talking about racism means you’re going to have to see and deal with your racism. And if our response to that risk is to simply not talk, it is perpetuated.
I am reminded of a segment of Tim Wise’s video on White Privilege where he talks about the difference between responsibility and guilt. On the subject of past wrongs committed against African Americans in this country, he uses an example of a new CEO who comes into a company and asks for an accounting of the firm from the CFO. After the company’s assets and liabilities are laid out, the CEO says he appreciates all of the information about the assets, but doesn’t need to hear about the debts because those were accumulated under past leadership…not their problem now.
If we ever want to be the kind of country and world that we dream of being, some accounting (in other words hearing and dealing with) the debts is in order. Otherwise we continue to perpetuate a myth.
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I’m sure the debts would feel a bit overwhelming. I suppose that’s why so many avoid it in the first place.
But whether we want to or not, I think that someday the accounts will be balanced, so we might as well get busy on it now.
… one day folks will quit becoming hysterical at being called “racist” and will instead understand what it means to be racist in our society.
I’ve yet to see a real dialogue on race in the whitosphere, and that includes Docudharma. It’s always the same old, same old.
That alone tells me something.
We have a long way to go, imo.
telling contradiction than the one the second writer points out. The second writer a finds a contradiction between “melting pot” and “celebrate our differences.” Well, it takes a pretty harsh reading of the “melting pot” metaphor to claim it means we have to avoid celebrating our differences. I suppose it can be read that way, as in “from many, one.”
But the more telling contradiction, I think, is between this:
And this:
This is pretty blatant. On the one hand she blames “work” for not letting her talk about blacks. Then she says the problem is all these people talking about race.
I think this is an example of special pleading: of saying there is a good reason for when you do a bad thing even when you agree the thing is normally bad. Now, I don’t agree that talking about race is bad, but apparently the writer does, even though she does it — in ways that she fears will get her fired.
This is a good example of the knots people tie themselves, and often the simple bad faith (among whites, especially), that tags along with race issues.
How about a Truth and Reconciliation Commission for ALL the wrongs the United States has done?
Also. Jack and Jill Politics is a must read.