Oh My God, Oh My God, OH MY GOD!!!

It’s finally happened:  the two most perfect babies in human history have been born.  Angelina Jolie, with Brad Pitt by her side, gave birth to twins Saturday night, a boy named Knox Leon and a girl named Vivienne Marcheline.  

Jolie and Pitt had recently moved to France and went to Nice for the births.  Our entire planet has been collectively holding its breath ever since the move.  I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say the world is obsessed with this event:

Though the lenses of the world’s paparazzi had been trained on maternity wards across the French Riviera, Jolie managed to slip unobserved into the clinic, which has magnificent views of the Mediterranean, reportedly arriving by helicopter on the hospital’s rooftop helipad.

Now don’t get me wrong — I’m happy for the couple and their twins.  I feel sorry for them already, for the inevitable intrusions on their lives that are sure to follow.  The obsession with them has gone beyond ridiculous.  The couple apparently chose France for the births because of its tough paparazzi laws as it relates to pictures of celebrity children.  Pictures of the babies could possibly sell for $15 million, which Jolie and Pitt have said they will donate to charity.  

What do we expect from these children to justify this frenzy?  Will they fulfill the prophecy by bringing balance to The Force?  Why (I ask myself stupidly) would someone pay $15 million for pictures of the newborns?  The answer, of course, is simple.  It will pay off for the buyer.  Our celebrity-obsessed culture will destroy vast forests of trees purchasing whatever magazine publishes the pictures.

On this blog we often ask ourselves, “Where is the outrage?”  Where is the outrage over the use of torture at Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo?  Where is the outrage over the Bush administration constantly pissing on the Constitution?  Where is the outrage at the bellicose war-mongering by the neocons?  Where is the outrage over a ruined economy?  Where is the outrage over the political prosecutions at the Justice (ha!) Dept?  

The outrage is missing because the attention is missing.  For some reason that drives me insane, most Americans are more interested in escaping reality than in confronting (and, God forbid, changing) reality.  We do have the occasional oasis such as Docudharma, where serious, well-informed people can gather and confront reality.  But unfortunately, “oasis” seems to be an apt description.  We’re in the middle of a desert where tabloids and television rule.

I wish you the best, Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline.  Try to rise above the vapid masses who are more interested in looking at your pictures than in reading a newspaper.  Learn about the world and its people.  Study history to understand the path we have traveled to get here.  Pay attention to your government and hold it accountable.  And check out Docudharma when you get a little older.      

 

21 comments

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  1. …and thank for taking some time to read Docudharma rather than NationalEnquirer.com

    • kj on July 13, 2008 at 16:23

    the lot of them.  ðŸ˜‰

    donate $$ to charity?  i doubt it, unless it is accompanied with a press release and a tax write-off.  

  2. The outrage is missing because the attention is missing.

    Drives me crazy sometimes too.

  3. I can’t think of a single, outrageous, snippy, snarky thing to say about this.  They’ve finally won.  They’ve exhausted my ability to respond.

    My plan for recovery?  Later today, administer massive amounts of Pacifico Beer with lime slices until my snark-o-meter is replenished.  I’ll be back.

    • Edger on July 13, 2008 at 17:45

    There are so many more important events and personal tragedies taking place now almost daily that Brad Pitt not getting laid (yeah, sure – I didn’t either…) for months and AJ having to put up with his whining just really doesn’t generate my sympathies like it should.

    I mean, the world is going to hell. As we speak. Who gives a goddamn about a couple of children anyway?

    CHAPPAQUA, NY – After months of tirelessly supporting his wife on the campaign trail, devoted spouse and former president Bill Clinton breathed a resigned sigh Monday and carefully folded the charcoal silk, fitted sheath dress he had hoped to wear as first lady during next January’s inauguration and placed it back in its beautiful box.

    The 61-year-old Clinton, who has appeared on the covers of both Time and Newsweek and has recently been lauded for his work as an outspoken advocate for human rights, purchased the Christian Dior gown earlier this year after wife Hillary announced her bid for the presidency. Though he has promised to stand by her until rival Barack Obama is officially named the Democratic nominee in August, Clinton told friends that he “could not bear” to look at the dress any longer.

  4. even reading this…. because I don’t now nor have I ever given a rat’s ass about, well whatever the hell this is. However, because it was you Fort, I took the chance and thank you, thank you!  

    DD really is the safe place.. away from all of the bullshit.  Now the only problem I have is knowing that twins were born and named.  aaggghh.  I so didn’t want this information in my head!  

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