The world bank force-feeds money

into “bankable projects” until their livers

croak, but we refuse to force-feed Muslims

on Ramadan?  The oil-besotted world

has no poor to think of; it IS Heaven!  

Albeit CO2 heavy.  The indignant,

high-profile rich cry like milk-choked whelps

sent to lobby the Pentagon of class warfare;

Cuz we punk-ass kids didn’t buy

their flexible flyers PS3 drones;

War-horny men whose missiles creamed

the launch pad: Gullet the blue pills!

Gum the suicidal works!  Whoops.  

Nausea, dizziness, exploding shits, etc.  

So, rather than prosecuting actual war criminals, the president is letting Congress use an outdated, illicit authorization for giant fucking war crimes devised by mass murderers, crafted by torturers and based on lies to justify taking away the Bill of Rights from us regular law-abiding citizens.  I guess the so-called “evil-doers” and “terrorists” abroad won’t be hating us for our freedoms anymore, after Obama rolls back 800 years of law.  This fascist defensive over-reaction is predictable from a president who himself is guilty of heinous war crimes in multiple countries, not to mention his abetting all-time record-breaking, imagination boggling financial crimes here at home.  No wonder this murdering thief, this constitutional scholar in name only is afraid of the law.  He rightly fears justice.  No wonder his guilty mind led him to pre-emptively brand us potential enemies of the state.  

Now I know for sure that Obama is trying to kill us by making us choke on our lunches with laughter.  Obama wants his spy drone back from Iran!

“We have asked for [our Sentinel drone] back. We’ll see how the Iranians respond,” Obama said during a joint news conference with Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki after the two met at the White House.

I’m sorry, but this ranks with the stupidest thing ever done by George W.  Talk about fulfilling a more humble foreign policy.  Assemble the laughingstocks!  (didn’t brooklynbadboy just wax rhapsodic about Obama’s passion for foreign policy?)

Meanwhile, Iran is extracting the espionage data in order to file a lawsuit against the US for the invasion of Iranian airspace.

I am going to poop myself.  If anything makes me support Barack Obama in 2012, it’s this kind of slapstick.  Kapow!

Seriously.  I am done.  Bring the straitjacket, cuz I can’t contain it.

Armando warmed over some leftovers from prior to when he (and Eric Holder) went into a coma in early 2006 and missed the news over the next five and one half years concerning a couple of elections solidly entrenching the status quo on executive fiat, secrecy, and hardened criminality, the mugging of democracy by the Fed-backed gambling addicts, gajillion dollar bailouts and banks (still not) saved, society sacrificed, sovereign debt blowouts, some thing-a-ma-bobs about the extrajudicial dusting of Americans and suspending the Constitution (again!) for the sake of Battlefield America, etc., you get the idea.  He begins (bold mine):

An age old question for a progressive site like Daily Kos, one committed to advancing progressive values within the electoral system, has been embodied in what many of us thought could be a definitive ethos (Big Lebowski reference): “More and better Democrats.”

He then cites two political physicists discussing gravity and space-time curvature.  I only slightly re-arranged their equation and came up with a slightly different solution to achieve political escape velocity (Pv_e):

Pv_e = (2_unipartiesG_ullibleM_orons/r_eally???)^1/2

Where B (not shown) = universal constant of bullshit = shit is fucked up and bullshit

Also, neat graphic!

Lynn Margulis is best known for postulating in 1966 the theory of endosymbiosis, the theory that eukaryotic cells (having nuclear DNA and nucleically differentiated organelles) resulted from the symbiotic fusion of smaller and more primitive prokaryotic cells.  Both mitochondria and chloroplasts, critical metabolic organelles in animal and plant eukaryotic cells, for example, are thought to be descended from independent prokaryotic lineages.  While her hypothesis was roundly rejected the over the first 15 or so submissions, the theory of endosymbiosis is now one of the most important ideas advanced in evolutionary biology in the last century.  As Richard Dawkins put it:

I greatly admire Lynn Margulis’s sheer courage and stamina in sticking by the endosymbiosis theory, and carrying it through from being an unorthodoxy to an orthodoxy. I’m referring to the theory that the eukaryotic cell is a symbiotic union of primitive prokaryotic cells. This is one of the great achievements of twentieth-century evolutionary biology, and I greatly admire her for it.

While I cannot do justice to the topic, several things do stand out to even a blockhead like me.  

Insect overlords shoot caustic fluids out their flame retardant asses as a self-defense mechanism.  It’s a natural evolution.  It’s nothing personal.

Once upon a time, little Victoria Jackson was staring blankly at a Clorox bottle when she overheard her mother screaming profanities at the TV in the other room.  From that day forward, she harbored a visceral and abiding hatred of bleach.  Especially Clorox bleach.

The End

Curio et al, 1978

Some Assembly Required:

Symbol: As the last Americans slunk out the gates of Camp Victory as it was turned over to the Iraqis, they took Saddam’s toilet with them. Victory, with a 27 mile perimeter, was the largest of the 505 bases the US military had contractors build for them. The toilet is made of stainless steel and cost the US about a trillion dollars all told. So now you know what we got out of the war.

“I’d like to thank the American elites, the entire neoconservative movement, The New York Times, especially Tom Friedman, David Brooks and Judith Fucking Miller, …[music starts]…wait, wait!  I was just getting started. I have so many people yet to thank…”

…and check the dip-stick on my salvation!

Ilargi: I’m convinced it’s not so much that it’s hard to understand; instead, it’s hard to accept. Still, for most people that’s enough reason to not understand.

It might therefore be a good moment to reiterate what we’ve said often before at The Automatic Earth: the financial system as we know it can not be saved. It doesn’t matter whether “official institutions” nominate 30 banks as being too big to fail, or 300. It is inevitable that the enormous amounts of debt accumulated in a relatively and amazingly short period of time must be serviced. Pay offs, write downs, defaults, bankruptcies. They’re cast in stone. It’s too late, too big to fail or not.

Here’s another gob-smacker that’s easier to understand than God is dead, but is even harder to accept: Not only is the economy about to get its zombie head blown off, it won’t be reincarnated as anything we’d recognize as normal for the foreseeable future, because the peak oil debate is over.

Again, it’s easy to understand that global oil production has clearly plateaued over the past seven years (for the first time since WWII), and that year-on-year declines are imminent. After we drink the second half of our milkshake, there’s no more milkshake.

Read the ASPO-USA press release, in particular the letter to Dr. Steven Chu, here.  Check with Dr. James Schlesinger (former Sec Def, CIA director, Sec Energy, Atomic energy Chair, etc.,), or Dr. Robert Hirsch (former Sec Energy, author of the 2005 Hirsch Report), or drop in at Dave Cohen’s joint.  

If you still find acceptance difficult, you may prefer to join Daniel Yergin and Barack Obama in their Pulitzer- and Peace Prize-clutching quest for oil, money and power.  You can buy yourself some limited edition Justice Coins to fondle during our next regime change humanitarian operation in the oily regions of the world.

Penn State’s self-inflicted disgrace is multiplying by the hour.  Anally raping 10-year olds in the locker room shower is horrifying beyond its mere criminal dimensions.  Sandusky deviously procured his child victims through his very own “charitable foundation for at-risk youths.”  Now we hear as yet unsubstantiated rumors that children may have been fetched and pimped out for some big money donors.   In any case, the cover-up by Paterno and scads and scads of other well-paid stewards of high stakes college football higher learning is likewise disturbing beyond any criminality that may obtain, and yet Paterno, who thanks to the long-delayed revelations is now the “winningest” coach in college football, is indignant at his treatment by the University.  

Almost unbelievably, Penn students rioted upon hearing news of Paterno’s firing by the Board of Trustees, thus issuing an unequivocal statement about their own deranged values as the nation’s next generation of leaders, intellectuals, role models, well-paid administrators.  The older, wiser, more politically astute Board of Trustees issued a not-so-carefully-worded statement indicating that they fired the university president Spanier and Paterno “in the best interests of the university.”  “In the best interests of university,” they repeated.  Yes, they emphasized their own afflicted motives as emotionless, conflicted agents eyeing the bottom line.  This is what it means to be a “winner,” Deacon.

This is our society in a nutshell, rotten through and through.  Based on these events, the entire football program at Penn State should be shut down indefinitely, as its particular incentives quite evidently disorder normal thinking and disrupt acceptable behavior across the entire swath of society it intersects.

“In the best interests of the university,” Penn State needs a l-o-o-o-ng time-out, while somebody draws some chalk on the board.

In the midst of chronically high unemployment, multiple endless and unwinnable resource wars abroad, a massive financial crime wave sweeping the nation, endemic abuses of civil liberties, worldwide debt deflation, over-population, peak oil, and global environmental collapse, the US House of Representatives will affirm the 1956 law designating our national motto as, “In God We Trust.”

Sponsor Rep. Randy Forbes (R-Vagina) stated that, “This confirmation of pre-existing law will corroborate and sustain our endorsement of (a) the one law already on the books that we pretend to give a shit about, (b) our faith in God to fill the void left by our incompetence, ignorance, and papier mache gestures and emotional inducements covering a complete lack of rectitude, and (c) not only our abdication of legislative responsibility, but our utterly pointless if not harmful political demagoguery in legislative acts explicitly prohibited by the US Constitution.  Someone has to fend for God, dad gummit!”

Next week, the House will take up legislation to make it illegal to wiggle while dancing or to sink the Hawaiian islands.  Also, no throwing Mardi Gras beads from third story balconies, because “you can’t get a good look at their titties down on Bourbon St. from way up there.”