Author's posts
Nov 01 2011
House to affirm national motto: E pluribus Fuck U-num
In the midst of chronically high unemployment, multiple endless and unwinnable resource wars abroad, a massive financial crime wave sweeping the nation, endemic abuses of civil liberties, worldwide debt deflation, over-population, peak oil, and global environmental collapse, the US House of Representatives will affirm the 1956 law designating our national motto as, “In God We Trust.”
Sponsor Rep. Randy Forbes (R-Vagina) stated that, “This confirmation of pre-existing law will corroborate and sustain our endorsement of (a) the one law already on the books that we pretend to give a shit about, (b) our faith in God to fill the void left by our incompetence, ignorance, and papier mache gestures and emotional inducements covering a complete lack of rectitude, and (c) not only our abdication of legislative responsibility, but our utterly pointless if not harmful political demagoguery in legislative acts explicitly prohibited by the US Constitution. Someone has to fend for God, dad gummit!”
Next week, the House will take up legislation to make it illegal to wiggle while dancing or to sink the Hawaiian islands. Also, no throwing Mardi Gras beads from third story balconies, because “you can’t get a good look at their titties down on Bourbon St. from way up there.”
Oct 29 2011
This week in European fashion: Default haute couture
Custom-fitted dresses for Greece. Everybody wants one! They’ll be all the rage in Milan, Lisbon, Dublin, Madrid and gay Paris. Anyone for a haircut?
However, according to Frau Merkel, “the rules [now] state that only “those companies mentioned on the list drawn up each year by a commission domiciled at the Ministry for Credit Default Swaps are entitled to avail themselves of the label haute couture.”
I think she meant, “Prevention is better than a cure.” But what cure? Paint your ass baboon pink and call it fashion?
Oct 27 2011
March of the Bonus Army
The more things change…the more the country still beats, shoots, gasses and kills its own citizens (veterans EVUHN!) after the bankers crash the economy. Good times. Under 30 min total.
But first, a message from Oakland via Bluegal:
“My part of Oakland is full of poor people. There’s at least one murder a week. Old creeps pimp out teenaged girls in broad daylight. You can buy crack or heroin 30 feet from my door, and two of my neighbors have been held up at gun point this summer. And the City of Oakland says they don’t have the police to stop any of that. But a bunch of people protesting the fact that rich people got a bail out and everyone else got nothing? The city shuts them down tight. Bang. Done. Riot act. Do you ever get the feeling you’ve been cheated? I do. Every day.”
Enjoy the show below.
Oct 24 2011
Rhymes with “Krakatoa’s gonna blow.”
Hustlers control the flow,
They lost their bets and now you owe
The deepest hole that they bestow,
A parting gift, the final blow.
Making off with all that dough,
Their stocks have hit a high plateau.
40 something years ago
The middle class was on the go,
Now what you “own” is what you owe,
The underwater big chateau
How far is down, how low is low?
Don’t look up, watch out below!
Hopey Changey’s status quo
Is emptier than a Home Depot
In jobless ranks he’s called “no-show.”
Of course, he’ll ask you to forgo
Retirement, the afterglow.
While bettors bet the food yo-yo,
And savings earn a fat zero.
Whose woods these are I think I know:
Wednesday’s child is full of woe,
The game’s been rigged to steal the show.
Angry protests grow and grow,
The cops responding with a blow
To the Charter’s final throe.
Tectonic plates begin to glow,
The sulphurous pyroclastic flow
Three times around the world will go.
Oct 22 2011
Put on your old grey bonnet
Whatever happened to my recording of Four Boys and a Guitar by the Mills Brothers, I dunno, but it’s a classic from the true Kings of Harmony.
The first vid has poor sound quality, but illustrates that, except for the guitar, they did everything, bass, harmonies, and “hand trumpets” using their voices.
Nagasaki:
Put on your old grey bonnet:
Paper Doll:
Oct 20 2011
Obama refuses to occupy William Black (or Why I hate Democrats).
William Black already has a teaching job, but what he really needs is an occupation at Justice where he can kick some fraudulent ass. Here’s vid from Democracy Now with Amy Goodman that I doubt gets front-paged at any high-traffic liberal blogs:
Oct 19 2011
Blank Frank
“I serve as a blank screen on which people of vastly different political stripes project their own views.” — Barack Obama, The Audacity of Hope
Oct 19 2011
OWS working demands, 5 themes.
disclaimer: these working demands came through “a” working group, and is not necessarily definitive, at all. The link came from HuffPo.
I see five major themes to the working demands of OWS.
Democracy/anti-plutocracy (items 1-5, 19):
(1) Public financing of federal elections, (2) nullify Citizen’s United, (3) 5-year ban on revolving door, (4) lifetime ban on gifts, (5) tax code reform, (19) additional campaign finance reform
Health Care (item 6):
(6) Health: single payer, Medicare for all
Environment (item 7):
(7) empower EPA enforcement, carbon caps, transition to renewables
Economy (items 8-18):
(8) sustainable debt/GDP ratio by 2020; (9) jobs program; (10) student loan debt relief; (11) immigration reform; (12) close non-essential military bases; (13) education with emphasis on tech and green, fair teacher pay; (14) rebuild manufacturing; (15) currency wars (?); (16) re-instate Glass-Steagall, investigate & prosecute market collapse; (17) end mortgage crisis; (18) one-year moratorium on foreclosures.
War (items 12 & 20):
(12) close non-essential bases, Congressional approval of war; (20) withdraw from Iraq & Afghanistan.
Oct 18 2011
Comprehensive failure
Another three-ton object hurtles from its decaying orbit towards Earth, so today must be another day ending in “y”. Dying in the brimstone of space junk, however, is not our most pressing matter by a long shot. Not that space junk crashing into other space junk is a minor concern, given our dependence on global communications that the fragile “junk-o-sphere” makes possible. A critical mass of fragment-generating collisions could be a real game changer, and is yet just another reminder of our seemingly infinite human ability to err on the side heedlessness.
Oct 17 2011