Whale Sign

Yes:  Don’t Kill the Whales

The singer in this piece, Irma Thomas is one of those great NOLA singers who never exactly hit the big time but has a following. She also has a new CD out if you like her pipes….

Any way hope y’all are having a great day. Don’t rec pony party. Hang out chit chat and then go read some of the excellent offerings on our recent and rec’d list…

This letter was recently sent by Tesco’s Head Office to a customer in Glasgow:

Dear Mrs. McTavish,

While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty

Card, I am considering banning you and your family from shopping with us unless

your husband modifies his behaviour. Below is a list of offences over the past few months, all verified by our

surveillance cameras:

 June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people’s

trolleys when they weren’t looking.

July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute

intervals.

July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine

products aisle.

July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,

‘Code 3 in Housewares’….. and watched what happened.

August 14: Moved a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.

September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told

shoppers he’d invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas

stove.

September 23: When the deputy manager asked if she could help him, he

began to cry and asked, ‘Why can’t you people just leave me alone?’

November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the

Housewares aisle, asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants

were.

December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the

‘Mission Impossible’ theme.

December 6: In the Kitchenware aisle, practised the ‘Madonna look’

using an assortment of funnels.

December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled out

‘PICK ME! PICK ME!’

December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed

the foetal position and screamed ‘NO! NO! It’s those voices again!’

And last, but not least:

December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while and

then yelled, very loudly, ‘There’s no toilet paper in here!’

Yours sincerely

Charles Brown

Store Manager

michael whelan

b.k.lusk

jim warren



animal nation lyrics