Tag: other jokes

Bank CEOs Pledge to Push for Re-Regulation

Chief executives of the largest U.S. banks acknowledged Monday the “disconnect” between their expressed support for re-regulating financial markets and the work of their lobbyists to weaken any new rules.

In later comments, one CEO elaborated as follows:

There’s a yawning chasm between what we say and what we do.  It’s unconscionable.

How big is this disconnect?  Well, say you had a choice between measuring it in angstroms or light years…take a guess!

It’s absolute, two-faced hypocrisy.

Let me give you an example: On one hand I’ve got Barney Frank’s balls in a vise, which I guess is why he’s always raising his eyebrows at everything we say, and on the other I’m drawing upon every inch of will power not to burst out laughing in the President’s face when he asks us to comply with greater lending and restraining our bonuses.  I mean, he can’t be serious.  And we know he’s not.  That’s what makes it so hard not to laugh.  Remember how Tim Conway used to crack-up Harvey Korman when he’d go off script?  God forbid that Lloyd Blankfein starts busting up, because it’s contagious, ya know?  That man is a riot.  The White House publicly said Blankfein showed contempt for the President in refusing to come to the last meeting, but privately they asked him not to come because of that comment about “doing God’s work.”  He even had the President laughing his guts out with that one.  And the President knows that’s no way to run a meeting to dress down us “fat cat bankers.”  I loved how the Wall Street journal played up the meeting as a no amenities, all business and brass tacks sort of thing: “The executives were served glasses of water — and nothing else -” as if we’re not milking it for all it’s worth, but that’s just Axelrod’s attention to detail. The President himself is damned good at keeping a straight face, but I’ve $300 million bucks that says we’re gonna make him laugh again, with or without Lloyd.