Tag: Rant of the Week

New York Pizza v Chicago Pizza

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Jon Stewart: Tower Record

Let me explain something, deep-dish pizza is not only not better than New York pizza. It’s not pizza. It’s a f***ing casserole!

Let me add this, if you can’t pick it up in one hand and have to eat it with a fork, it isn’t pizza.

Rahm Emanuel Sends Jon Stewart And ‘Daily Show’ ‘Deep Dish With Dead Fish’ After Pizza Fight

Apparently dead fish are Rahm Emanuel’s version of an olive branch. [..]

In a nod to one of his most infamous political shenanigans, Chicago’s mayor made sure the deep-dish pies were topped with dead fish (y’ know, anchovies). [..]

Yet as much as the feisty mayor wanted the last word, Stewart and company were having none of it. Their response to Emanuel’s “peace” offering? A Vine video showing a pooch turning his nose up at the delicious pie.

Bill Maher – New Rules: Christian Values – Love Thy Neighbor

Adapted from Rant of the Week st The Stars Hollow Gazette

Bill Maher – New Rules: Christian Values – Love Thy Neighbor

See No Evil

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

The Word – See No Evil

Allegations surface that the NSA spied on the Vatican, and Representative Mike Rogers defends the agency via circular logic.

Rep. Mike Rogers Angrily Defends Bathroom Spycam

by Ken White, Techdirt

Representative Mike Rogers (R-Michigan) was defiant today in the face of accusations that he had installed a small digital camera in the women’s bathroom in his office at the Capitol.

“This is just politics,” said the ten-term Congressman. “I would argue the fact that we haven’t had any women come forward with any specificity arguing that their privacy has been violated, clearly indicates, in ten years, clearly indicates that something must be doing right. Somebody must be doing something exactly right.”

When reporters asked how women would know to complain – the spycam, funded by the government, was expertly hidden – Rogers asserted that was the point. “You can’t have your privacy violated if you don’t know your privacy is violated ,” said Rogers.

Rogers went on to explain that the nation’s Capitol – which has housed figures like former Congressman Bob Filner and former Senator Bob Packwood – presents known dangers to women, and that the spycam is calculated to make certain they are protected from those dangers. “If the women knew exactly what that spycam was about, they would be applauding and popping champagne corks. It’s a good thing. it keeps the women safe. It keeps the Capitol safe,” Rogers asserted.

Rogers then abruptly concluded the interview, threatening to sue reporters if they wrote about it.

So, by Rep. Rogers premise, if a person is knocked unconscious and raped, it’s not a rape because you didn’t know about it at the time. Right. What a pig.

Bill Maher’s New Rules: Minimum Wage

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Earn Notice

October 25, 2013 – Bill Maher ended his show Friday night going after Republican opposition to the minimum wage, calling them out for opposing something that would make people less dependent on government handouts. He targeted McDonalds in particular, saying “until Ronald McDonald starts paying his employees a living wage, he has to wipe that fucking smile off his face.”

When did the American Dream become the path to indentured servitude?

This is the question the right has to answer. Do you want smaller government with less handouts, or do you want a low minimum wage? Because you cannot have both.

“Medican’t”

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Medican’t

Health-challenged states like Texas and Mississippi refuse to take advantage of a federally subsidized Medicaid expansion.

If statehood was health care, moocher states like Mississippi and Missouri would be rejected as having a preexisting condition.

The Cali-phate of California

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

California is leading by example

New Rule: Conservatives Who Love to Brag About American Exceptionalism Must Come Here to California

Bill Maher, Huffington Post

New Rule: Conservatives who love to brag about American exceptionalism must come here to California, and see it in person. And then they should be afraid — very afraid. Because while the rest of the country is beset by stories of right-wing takeovers in places like North Carolina, Texas and Wisconsin, California is going in the opposite direction and creating the kind of modern, liberal nation the country as a whole can only dream about. And not only can’t the rest of the country stop us — we’re going to drag you along with us.

It wasn’t that long ago that pundits were calling California a failed state and saying it was ungovernable. But in 2010, when other states were busy electing whatever Tea Partier claimed to hate government the most, we elected a guy who actually liked it, Jerry Brown.[..]

Since then, everything Republicans say can’t or won’t work — gun control, immigration reform, high-speed rail — California is making work. And everything conservatives claim will unravel the fabric of our society — universal healthcare, higher taxes on the rich, gay marriage, medical marijuana — has only made California stronger. And all we had to do to accomplish that was vote out every single Republican. Without a Republican governor and without a legislature being cock-blocked by Republicans, a $27 billion deficit was turned into a surplus, continuing the proud American tradition of Republicans blowing a huge hole in the budget and then Democrats coming in and cleaning it up.

Bill Maher: The US: world’s policeman or schoolyard bully?

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Bill Maher Syria Policy Makes Us Look Like Zimmerman

The US: world’s policeman or schoolyard bully?

by Bill Maher, The Guardian

Ever since 9/11, it seems America’s just been itching for a fight – and any Muslim country will do. Really, who acts like this?

New rule: 12 years after 9/11, and amidst yet another debate on whether to bomb yet another Muslim country, America must stop asking the question, “Why do they hate us?” Forget the debate on Syria, we need a debate on why we’re always debating whether to bomb someone. Because we’re starting to look not so much like the world’s policeman, but more like George Zimmerman: itching to use force and then pretending it’s because we had no choice. [..]

Since 1945, when Jesus granted America air superiority, we’ve bombed Korea, Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Lebanon, Grenada, Panama, Iraq, Serbia, Somalia, Bosnia, the Sudan, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Libya and Yemen. And Yemen only because the tenth one was free.

How did we inherit this moral obligation to bring justice to the world via death from above? Are we Zeus? It doesn’t make any sense. Our schools are crumbling, and we want to teach everyone else a lesson?

Stephen Colbert: Kitten Subway Crisis & NYC Mayoral Race

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Kitten Subway Crisis & NYC Mayoral Race

NYC mayoral candidate Joe Lhota goes after the key anti-kitten demographic after two lost kittens shut down America’s largest transportation system.

Kittens Stop NYC Subway Service

It only took two kittens to stop the city’s subway in its tracks.

Power was cut to the B and Q lines in Brooklyn for more than an hour after a woman reported Thursday morning that her kittens were loose in the nation’s largest subway system, transit officials said.

The furry felines, one black and the other white with gray stripes, were finally found on the tracks and rescued about seven hours later.

How they got there was a mystery. But they were seen running dangerously close to the high-voltage third rail.

Their owner rushed to a subway station with cat food for transit workers dispatched onto the tracks to use to try to corral them.

Joe Lhota, NYC Mayoral Hopeful, Wouldn’t Stop Trains For Kittens

A former chairman of the Metropolitan Transit Authority and New York City mayoral hopeful says he wouldn’t have stopped the subway because two lost kittens were scrambling along the tracks. [..]

Other mayoral hopefuls tell the paper they would’ve stopped the trains.

Fortunately, there are more cat lovers in NYC than Republican voters.

“The Most Honest Three Minutes In Television History”

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Last year HBO debuted the series “The Newsroom” starring Jeff Daniels as a the very flawed anchor, “Will McAvoy“, of a popular nightly news hour on the fictitious cable channel ACN. Up until now, I have only used real people but I thought this rant was worth discussion.

This is a clip from  the “We Just Decided To” episode where “McAvoy” is asked by a college student at a “town hall,”  “Can you say why America is the greatest country in the world?”



Trnascript can be read here

h/t Lambert Strether at naked capitalism

Bill Maher Calls Out the Left’s Super Rich

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Bill Maher challenges the left’s super rich to get in the game.

Going Coup-Coup

August 2, 2013 – (Real Time w/ Bill Maher – New Rules – Going Coup-Coup) – Bill Maher ended his show Friday night with a plea to rich liberals to even out the playing field so it’s not just “rich assholes” supporting the GOP pushing the policies they want all over the country. In particular, Maher singled out how one North Carolina businessman has been able to push his agenda through the state legislature, and with just a hint of subtlety, Maher used the segment as a direct appeal to the artist Jay Z, who, as luck would have it, was sitting right next to him.

Maher shared with liberal America a tale of “proud people in a region where religious freedom, women’s right, and democracy itself hang in the balance”: North Carolina. Maher explained how the state has gone “apeshit” with laws like a ban on Sharia and allowing concealed guns on playgrounds. Although the latter does mean “if your toddler gets knocked down in the sandbox, he can stand his ground.”

And that’s not even including the abortion debate. Maher explained this shift in the previously-“trending blue” state by introducing the audience to Art Pope, another one of the right-wing “rich assholes” throwing their money and influence around to get the laws they want. Maher declared, “It’s no longer our ideas versus their ideas, or even our base versus their base, it’s our super-rich versus their super-rich.”

He hinted to Jay Z that he should buy a state too, but he didn’t end there. Maher made direct appeals to Steven Spielberg, Tyler Perry, and Oprah Winfrey to buy states of their own to at least even the score.

John Hodgeman: Patenting Human Genes

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Patenting Human Genes

John Hodgman analyzes the financial repercussions of the Supreme Court’s decision on human gene patenting

If Abraham Lincoln stood for anything, it was the capitalist right to profit off the human body.

Rant of the Week: Chris Hayes

Adapted from Rant of the Week at The Stars Hollow Gazette

Congress protects air travelers alone among sequester victims

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