Those nice folks there in Texas need help, America! And I don’t mean from that awful “porkulus” bill that Mr. Socialism thinks will start stimulatin’ our economy. Texas has a different pork problem, in that a plague of wild hogs are roamin’ over the land, tearin’ up the crops there and just makin’ a general nuisance of themselves. Help IS on the way though, because I’m hearin’ that Texas may allow hog-huntin’ from helicopters! Ooooohhhhh . . . I just felt a tingle go up my leg . . .
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Naturally the liberals are already whinin’ about it, like somebody just told ’em they have to go to church or something. There is NOTHING to worry about, because the bill’s Republican sponsor, Sid Miller, assures us that:
“You’re not going to have some bubba up there going, ‘Pass me a beer and ammo’ and hunting some hogs,” the legislator said. “We certainly want to do it right.”